Good day all Human fleshed ones.

I am the one and the only Ignatius Polony III, and the fact that there were two Ignatius Polony’s before my existence, is not relevant. There can only be one Igantius Polony III
I am the defender of my peo… porked ones! (all though I only speak for Polony! And Polony only!) I hail from the pink planet Porkdome and I am here to defend my porked ones. And yes, I have said that before, but I have lost my notes and I will make it up as I go along. I have received the calling. I am the one. And I shall prevail!

Oh lord polony, I bow to your will! Whatever you command, I shall do so! I hope my efforts to propagate your cult have been satisfactory so far?

yeah.. e... hi, polony person.

I smell a rat........

gonna start calling you captainpolony from now on...

rat polony? Guh! * shivers *

Ah master! I am your servant! Ask anything and I will do it!

Captain Polony? I'm both honoured and affronted that you would dare subvert the authority of Polony to a mere acolyte such as myself! Kidult, your punishment will be swift!

Brain Worms!!!

Please ignore Miss LaFey, she is bigoted to our cause and shall be removed shortly...

hmm..I already think the chicken polony is dodgy.....and eat it, so rat flavoured polony should be fine??

a good day to you, o pink meat'ed one.

I'm still undecided as to where Phreak's loyalties lie in all this...